Class Act
by Miss Mei
Summary: a teacher teaches her students a little lesson on gundam wing
1. Default Chapter

Class Act

Class Act

N 2 R (note to readers): I'm sorry; I'm sorry, I-I just do not know why I wrote this.

(Bell rings, young Kindergartners take their seats.)

Teacher: As you know after lunch is free time. Don't try to trick me, I have a note from your teacher. You have a choice learning, teaching, or story time.

Class: Uh…

Teacher: Story time it is. So here's the story. There once was a guy named Dou. He piloted a Mecha.

(Kid raises his hand)

Teacher: Yes. Jimmy?

Jimmy: Teacher what are Mecha's?

Teacher: Mecha's are birds that died 3 million years ago but scientist made it so that andriods could fly them too.

(Lowers hand) 

Teacher: As I was saying. Dou liked this boy named Heero, but Heero didn't know it, so one night…

(Jimmy raises hand)

Teacher: what is it Jimmy?

Jimmy: Teacher, Mommy and daddy say that boys don't like each other, they can only be friends.

Teacher: Jimmy, your Mommy and Daddy are idiots. They come from the planet Ie, not to be confused Russia.

Jimmy: Boys can kiss each other too?

Teacher: Only if your name is Quatre.

Jimmy: who?

Teacher: Your sister. Anyway, Dou and Heero were talking and all of a sudden Heero kissed Dou. Dou was really a girl but Heero didn't know so…

Jimmy: I thought you said Dou was a boy?

Teacher: No, I said that Dou was the pilot of a Mecha.

Jimmy: Does that mean he flies a bird?

Teacher: No, but he can flip one.

Jimmy: What?

Teacher: Your father told me. So anyway! Dou kissed Heero and Dou didn't know Heero was a girl. So he just kept kissing him anyway. Three months later Dou had a baby and named it Shqa Le. The End.

Jimmy: Teacher I thought only mommies had babies?

Teacher: They do Heero had a baby so now Dou is a mommy. Class dismissed.

Student: Ms. Madame, its 11:45.

Teacher: It's a half-day, go home. If your parents have a problem, just come back to the school and stand where my car used to be parked.


	2. Class Act Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Period 3- High School Subbing  
  
(Bell Rings, students file into class and sit quietly.)  
  
The teacher sat down slowly as she picked up the attendance sheet left on the desk.  
  
TEACHER: Alright, quiet down everyone. Quiet! I SAID KEEP IT DOWN!! @#$%q@#$%@#$%@# %@#%@#%!!!  
  
CLASS: ..  
  
TEACHER: My name is Ms. Madame, I'm standing for your teacher today.  
  
(Student raises their hand.)  
  
TEACHER: Yes? Child?  
  
STUDENT: Why is the teacher absent?  
  
TEACHER: AM I REALLY SUPPOSED TO KNOW???!!!!  
  
CLASS: ..  
  
TEACHER: (clears her throat) You were left an assignment, it says here to open up your World History book to page-  
  
(Student raises hand)  
  
TEACHER: Yes???  
  
STUDENT: Um.  
  
TEACHER: WHAT!  
  
STUDENT: ..This is an Algebra 2 class.  
  
TEACHER: (twitches slightly) It says on this paper, that this is a World History class..  
  
STUDENT: Yes, but-  
  
TEACHER: SINCE NO ONE IS OBVIOUSLY PREPARED, I SHALL TEACH A LITTLE OF THE "WORLD HISTORY" THAT I KNOW.(looks around the room) TO YOU!  
  
CLASS: ...  
  
TEACHER: A long time ago this was a land called Gaea, most people pronounce it Gaea, but I like the pronounce it as Gaea. But anyway, this land used to be inhabited by (1) Gaeameliths. These-  
  
(Another Student raises hand.)  
  
TEACHER: Yes!?  
  
ANOTHER STUDENT: Your wrong.  
  
TEACHER: Excuse me??  
  
ANOTHER STUDENT: First of all this land was not called Gaea, I don't even know what that is.  
  
TEACHER: WELL, THAT'S WHY YOU'RE BEING EDUCATED BY ME!!!  
  
ANOTHER STUDENT: Well-  
  
TEACHER: SILENCE! HOW DARE YOU QUESTION MY KNOWLEDGE OF WORLD HISTORY!!  
  
STUDENT: HE'S NOT QUESTIONING, YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR'RE TALKING ABOUT!  
  
TEACHER: (gasps taken aback) You shall surely pay for your disrespect!  
  
STUDENT: I'M NOT AFRAID OF YOU!  
  
TEACHER: (grabs an eraser off of her desk flinging it lethally at the student)  
  
STUDENT: (blocks the brunt of the attack with his arm, then flinging a piece of loose leaf notebook paper at the teacher, cutting her cheek with an overly penetrating slice of her skin.)  
  
TEACHER: No. (falls backward into her desk chair) My.my face, how dare you! MY FACE!!! (lays on her desk and sobs) You will pay for this- this- injustice to beauty. (Sobs)  
  
(BELL RINGS, CLASS FILES OUT OF THE ROOM. STUDENT REMAINS STANDING IN THE ROOM.)  
  
STUDENT: This time you have lost Ms. Madame. ( Quickly exits room )  
  
TEACHER: (slowly lifts her head up) Oh no my dear student, I have not lost. We shall finish this another time, and you shall pay for harming my- my- my- FACE!!  
  
~End~ Till next period~ 


End file.
